The sad news of John Clarke’s death this week reminded former Newcastle Herald journalist James Joyce of his 1997 interview with the satirist.
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Clarke discussed his favourite story about Newcastle – as told to him by one of its favourite sons, Bob Hudson of The Newcastle Song fame.
Clarke described Hudson’s tale as one of the funniest he'd ever heard. So funny in fact, that the usually deadpan funnyman cracked up uncontrollably as he retold it to the Herald.
“It was about when he (Hudson) was in school and the Queen came to Newcastle in 1954,” Clarke began. “Apparently, there was a place near Newcastle where the train she was on was not going to stop but was going to slow down. In the weeks leading up to this prestigious occasion, all the local kids were trained to stand in a position on a hill so that the Queen would see them standing, forming the word ‘WELCOME’.
“They spent a couple of weeks getting this right but there was a flu epidemic and a whole lot of people got crook, so when the Queen came flashing through she looked out on the hill and saw WELC.”
Clarke recalled the first time Hudson told him the story.
“God, I laughed. I can never think of Newcastle without thinking of the wonderful ‘welc’ Hudson told me about,” he said.
Like a Labyrinth
Large institutions can be hard to navigate. All those corridors make it hard to find your way around.
Hospitals in particular. Finding your way through the maze of a hospital is like solving a cryptic crossword.
We’ve all seen those TV shows and movies where a hospital visitor ends up in an operating theatre or quarantined section.
Thankfully the good folk at John Hunter Hospital have recognised this problem.
They’re recruiting volunteers for a new program to help visitors find their way around the place.
It’s called, you guessed it, the “Way Finding” program.
Volunteer services manager Kristine Burke said it was not uncommon for people to be anxious and frustrated when visiting a hospital.
“They walk in a corridor and think, ‘oh my goodness where do I go from here’,” she said.
“So it’s a wonderful service that we’ll be able to offer.”
The volunteers will be positioned at the hospital’s main entrances. They’ll be asked to commit to at least a four-hour shift each week.
Those selected will add to the 200 volunteers who work at the hospital.
The program will begin in late May. Those interested in becoming a volunteer can ring Kristine on 4922 3009.
Text Neck
A new kind of health disorder is apparently troubling adults and teens (probably tweens too).
The condition has been dubbed “text neck”.
A recent survey by [you guessed it] the Chiropractors’ Association of NSW, found that 11 to 20 patients a week were suffering chronic neck pain, headaches, poor posture and repetitive strain injuries in the wrist and hands from texting.
“These are patients who are constantly looking at their phone in a bent-forward position,” the association’s president Dr John de Voy said.
“Postural bad habits over time can develop into more serious health conditions such as spinal degenerative disease, osteoarthritis, hunchback and reduced mobility.”
Dr de Voy urged health policy makers to tackle the “dangers of text-neck disorder and smartphone addiction”.