JARED Waerea-Hargreaves versus Sam Burgess is a clash that ensures the NRL judiciary panellists are clearing their diaries for a guaranteed overtime shift next week.
And the two serial offenders don't disappoint.
Big Sam finds himself in strife for pulling the hair of Roosters rookie Billy Smith, while JWH reaffirms his reputation as one of the game's most innovative grubs by unveiling a new tackling technique.
We've all seen the grapple, the chicken wing, the wishbone, the cannonball, the crusher and more recently the wing-nut, and tonight the Kiwi Test prop introduces the "snooker ball".
It involves crunching the head of an opponent, in this case Rabbitohs forward Liam Knight, so that it ricochets into the melon of a teammate, in this case Chooks tyro Lindsay Collins.
The degree of difficulty is high, but in the hands of a skillful practitioner like JWH the results are undeniably effective.
Knight gets a free trip to Disneyland, covered in claret, and JWH will be renewing acquaintances with his mates at the judiciary on Tuesday night.
BIG Sammy Burgess is entitled to be a tad confused after copping a contrary-conduct charge that means he will miss the first round of the finals.
A few weeks ago, he decapitated Matt Moylan and the judiciary ruled "play on". Now he's doing time for a schoolyard prank.
"What a joke. Seriously, how embarrassing. Fancy missing a week for pulling a bloke's hair. That will do me," says Blocker Roach, who once missed an entire finals series for patting referee Eddie Ward on the head and calling the touch judge a "wombat".
Given that Burgess has now been charged 16 times by the match-review panel since 2010, for everything from high shots to squirrel grips, about the only offence left on his bucket list is a good old-fashioned John Hopoate-style backdoor blitz.
Meanwhile, Manly's Marty Taupau, who last week was complaining about "being showcased around like a zoo animal", reverts to the law of the jungle in his team's clash with Parramatta.
The man known as Marty "Kapow" produces a textbook stiff arm that knocks out Parra's Ray Stone, stone cold. At least he will be able to serve his suspension with head held high, unlike Sam Burgess.
YOU can take the boy out of Greta-Branxton, but apparently you can't take the Greta-Branxton out of the boy.
Raiders rookie Hudson Young finds himself the centre of attention after performing an uncanny impersonation of a Josh McGuire-style "facial" on Warriors winger Adam Pompey.
You might assume that, given he served a five-game ban for eye-gouging earlier in the season, Young would be a bit wary about going anywhere near an opponent's peepers.
But slow-motion replays suggest his fingers have been possessed by the devil.
"That is a disgraceful act ... that's just crap," fumes Foxtel commentator Brett Finch.
"It's really poor.
"He could go anywhere from 12 to 20 weeks. Why shouldn't he? He's done it before."
Raiders coach Ricky Stuart, however, is adamant it wasn't an eye-gouge, just a grade-five brain explosion.
"Where he had his hand was stupid and, if there's a grading for stupidity, that's what it is," Sticky says.
Jonathan Thurston adds weight to that theory when he asks: "Is he the dumbest player ever? Clearly."
REMEMBER at the start of the season when the NRL were talking about a "wildcard weekend" when teams nine and 10 could play off with seventh and eighth for the last two spots in the finals?
Well it's sounding pretty good right now to fans of Penrith and the Knights.
At full-time, however, after their team cop a 54-10 pizzling, the Novocastrian faithful are wondering if teams 11 and 12 can also be given wildcards.
I'd even go one step further and propose a play-off series for the bottom eight teams.
Each week the winning sides are eliminated until you are left with the two ultimate easybeats contesting the "bland final", the loser of which has to embark on a lap of dishonour holding the wooden spoon, as the crowd pelt them with rotten tomatoes.
Meanwhile, the Sharks have been missing goals all season long, but the solution emerges during their 25-8 win over the Tigers at Leichhardt, when skipper Paul Gallen pops the first one-pointer of his 347-game career.
What odds on him nailing one from the sideline to win the grand final?
THE NRL threatens to move this week's semi-final from Brookvale after traces of asbestos are discovered on the hill.
To think those stuck-up Silvertails have spent four decades looking down their noses at the Fibros from the western suburbs, when all along their home ground has been a dump site for hazardous James Hardie products.
Surely the NRL has no option here except to transfer the game ... to Lidcombe Oval.
AN emotional plea from Ricky Stuart is not enough to save Hudson Young from an eight-week suspension.
"I'm really disappointed in some of the comments that have been aimed at Hudson ... he's got a mother out there who is really in desperate need for her son and she's very upset," Sticky says. "Hudson is very upset. We've got to think about the person here as well."
It's a fair point. I mean, Adam Pompey can buy himself a guide dog and a cane, but poor old Hudson has to deal with this blight on his reputation for the rest of his life.
I NOTE with interest a media release referring to Canberra's proposed new centre of excellence.
About time. The Raiders haven't had a centre of excellence since Mal Meninga and Ruben Wiki helped them win the 1994 grand final.
Jarrod Croker and Joey Leilua are centres of slightly above average, in comparison.
Meanwhile, congratulations to League HQ tipping comp joint champions Yvonne Sampson and Barry Toohey.
Kate Haberfield, who finished a point behind them despite loyally tipping the Knights every week, can claim a moral victory.
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