THURSDAY
KNIGHTS fan Wal Remingon, of Mount Hutton, shares his thoughts on the Herald's opinion page after his team's last-round 54-10 pizzling from Penrith.
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Wal reckons the Knights "once again buckled at the knees" and left him to deal with the taunts of his smart-arse mates.
"I expected too much and too little was delivered ... I'm thoroughly disgusted," Wal writes. "I haven't waited since 1999 for this rubbish. Heaven help our new coach."
Wal then produces an intriguing suggestion that would ensure Newcastle's players remain occupied while their rivals are hard at work in the play-offs.
"How could some of those fellows who played on Sunday possibly go on a Mad Monday to celebrate the season? Possibly six or seven should go but the others should be made to mow the grass at No.1 Sportsground, as they are not worthy of mowing McDonald Jones Stadium."
I'm sure plenty of fans will agree with Wal's viewpoint, and perhaps even his proposed work-experience stint.
My only concern is that, judging by their efforts this season, any players assigned to the Victa would lose interest, run out of petrol and leave the job half-finished.
FRIDAY
NATHAN Brown insists he's not a grub. That's Nathan Brown, the Parramatta lock, not Nathan Brown the ex-Knights coach, nor Nathan Brown, the former Western Bulldogs and Richmond AFL star.
Brown has just served a two-game suspension for a shoulder charge but insists he doesn't deserve to be labelled a cheap-shot merchant.
"I've said it to a few people, that it's my first time getting suspended, and they go: 'What? I can't believe it'," Brown says.
"It peeves me off a bit because it's something that I've got a reputation for, and I don't know why because I'd never been suspended before this."
Poor old Browny. He's an angry man at the best of times. I'd hate to be in Brisbane's shoes on Sunday now that the judiciary has peeved him off.
On the subject of the game's law enforcers, Roosters prop Jared Waerea-Hargreaves should need no directions after being put on report during the 30-6 demolition of the Bunnies.
Big JWH has made the trek so many times he could surely find his way there blindfolded.
The only problem is that his stash of Get Out Of Jail Free cards must be getting a bit thin.
SATURDAY
FIREWORKS are expected in the clash between Melbourne and Canberra ... but most assumed it would happen after the game kicks off.
That's until Raiders centre Joey Leilua cops part of a pyrotechnic device in his mince pie running onto the pitch and spends the first few minutes of the play-off with the optometrist.
There is uproar about how such a debacle could happen, but I can't help thinking the Storm deserve full credit for their "eye for an eye" mentality.
Last week the Raiders had a bloke suspended for eight weeks for gouging. It seems as if Melbourne have decided to retaliate first and fight fire with firecrackers.
Meanwhile, at Brookvale, Cronulla players, intimidated by the threat of suffering asbestosis, surrender meekly to Manly's reserve-grade team.
The loss marks the end of the road for Sharks skipper Paul Gallen, who is retiring at the age of 68 to pursue a new career as a nightclub bouncer.
Nobody has shed more blood for the Sharkies over the years than Gal, who cops one last head wound, for old time's sake.
SUNDAY
MOST thought Canberra's bubble would have burst long before now. But after last night's boilover in Melbourne, they've qualified for a home preliminary final.
Raiders officials are talking about adding 5000 temporary seats at GIO Stadium, which means you should be able to hear the Viking clap all the way to Goulburn.
Mind you, coach Ricky Stuart will make sure he keeps his players focused by encasing them in bubble wrap.
"We've got to live in our own bubble - and that won't be the Canberra bubble," Sticky says.
In the final play-off of the weekend, Brisbane produce a heroic effort to contain Parra to 58-0.
Remember all that talk about relocating a Sydney team so there are two franchises in Brisbane?
Maybe it's the Broncos who need relocating ... to Chernobyl.
MONDAY
THE second successive Monday passes since the end of the regular season, without a single mention of players disgracing themselves in public.
Either these blokes aren't having a go, or a time-honoured tradition has fallen by the wayside.
TUESDAY
SCANDALOUS revelations emerge that a group of Broncos players were spotted playing the pokies the night before their final against the Eels.
I'll be interested to see how the NRL integrity unit handle this one.
Given that group sex, drugs and booze are frowned upon, players have been left with limited options to keep themselves entertained on road trips.
In this case, I can't understand what all the fuss is about. Indeed, I would even suggest it's commendable that players are out there in the community, showing that you don't have to be a blue-collar battler or pensioner to pour a week's wages into Queen of the Nile. If you think that, for generations, the poker-machine industry kept rugby league afloat, it's good to see players giving something back to the game.
WEDNESDAY
SERIAL head-hunter, crusher tackler, shoulder charger, squirrel gripper and hair puller Sam Burgess - brother of eye-gouger George Burgess - offers a forthright opinion on the NRL judiciary system.
"I don't know what the process is," Burgess says. "It's like a kangaroo court in there ... was it bad? Did anyone get injured? Was anyone hurt? Was it silly? Is it part of the game? Was it in the contest? Yeah. All right, then fine the player."
NRL chief executive Todd Greenberg looks set to heed that advice after issuing a please explain, which is likely to be followed by a breach notice.
Funnily enough, I don't remember the big Pom whingeing about the judiciary when he decapitated Matt Moylan and received a "play on" ruling.