"It's not of concern to us," V'landys insists.

"It's like feeding meat to a vegetarian. The vegetarian might try it for a few minutes but then goes back to being a vegetarian."

It's an interesting analogy, but I'm not sure if Pete has done his research.

Queenslanders are simple folk who believe that daylight savings fades the curtains. Their beer is sold in distinctive cans labelled "XXXX" because most of them can't read and write. They prefer wearing thongs because it helps when they have to count to 20.

It's a well-known fact that they're strictly a meat-and-potatoes mob north of the border, and vegetarians live in constant fear of persecution.

Meanwhile, V'landys boldly predicts Andrew Abdo "will probably be the best CEO the NRL will ever have". It's a big call, but then again, it's not as if he's up against an Olympic-class field.

It was only a few years ago, remember, that we had Pommy blow-in Dave Smith running the joint.

Smithy was a high-flying merchant banker (that's not rhyming slang, by the way), but it was widely accepted that he wouldn't have known a Benji Barba from a Ben Marshall.

THE AFL continue their campaign to conquer the Banana Republic with a brazen publicity stunt.

Two Richmond Tigers players - Sydney Stack and Callum Coleman-Jones - are arrested at 3.30am on the Gold Coast, after apparently flouting bubonic plague protocols by visiting a strip club and a kebab shop.

It's a pretty sad state of affairs when AFL players are impersonating their rugba league counterparts, just so that people take a passing interest in them.

In the Twilight Zone (Friday, 6pm) game, Cronulla halfback Chad Townsend is sent off for a kamikaze shoulder charge on Kalyn Ponga.

Slow-motion replays of the hit reveal what initially appears to be a tooth flying through the air.

It's actually the bloodied cotton buds stuffed up KP's snoz, which copped a nasty whack earlier in the game.

The wadding would no doubt make a prized souvenir for some lucky fan, but sadly it has to be removed from the field by security staff wearing hazmat suits.

THE hype surrounding Sonny Bill Williams reaches fever pitch as he prepares to make his NRL comeback against the Raiders.

NRL CEO Andrew Abdo reckons SBW has generated 17,000 media mentions, which he says amounts to $30 million worth of free publicity.

If that's the case, the least the NRL can do is offer to reimburse Sonny for the $750,000 he had to fork out to quit the Bulldogs back in 2008.

Meanwhile, I am intrigued to read a Daily Telegraph report about the likely global TV audience tuning in to watch SBW go around again.

"It's difficult to predict but I think the final figure would be around 100 million," an unnamed TV executive tells the Telegraph.

Wow, 100 million ... compared to the two million who watched last season's State of Origin series decider,.

That's on a par with the NFL Super Bowl viewing numbers last year. Is SBW as big as the Super Bowl?

I'll let you do the maths.

I NOTE with interest a story in the Sunday Telegraph that declares the Roosters' jersey is "the first $5 million playing strip in rugby league history".

"Winning grand finals and having high-profile players helps but it's not everything," Roosters commercial boss Jarrod Johnstone explains.

"Our partners want to be with the Roosters because of the club that we are and the people that we are ... the sponsors want to engage with quality people."

It must be like shooting fish in a barrel for Jarrod, compared to when he worked for the Knights a few years back.

In those days the Knights were owned by Nathan Tinkler, and the best they could do for a major sponsor was an imaginary company called Hunter Ports, which was eventually wound up with debts of $75 million.

REPORTS emerge that highly paid spectators Josh Reynolds and Russell Packer bailed out and left Brookvale at half-time, and were heading back across the Harbour Bridge as their Wests Tigers teammates mounted a stirring comeback.

Tigers coach Michael Maguire is apparently oblivious to this, but later confirms the high-profile duo did indeed do the Harold Holt.

The sheepish explanation they give Madge is that they were "cold".

You'd have thought maybe they could borrow a tracksuit top for the second half.

Then again, they have been copping the cold shoulder from the coach for most of the season.

THE Daily Telegraph reports that SBW's comeback game had "sports lovers from all over the country tuning in to Fox League, Kayo, Foxtel Go and Foxtel Now in record numbers".

The record number reportedly amounted to 468,000 ... which made it the third-most-viewed match this NRL season.

By my calculations, that means there must have been 99.532 million viewers overseas.

NEW Dragons coach Anthony Griffin reckons enigmatic playmakers Corey Norman and Ben Hunt can steer the club to success next season.

And for Griffin's next trick, I am reliably informed he will produce a vaccine for coronavirus.

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