Parents should talk to their kids about the Greta bus disaster to help them process their feelings, a parent coach says.
Subscribe now for unlimited access.
$0/
(min cost $0)
or signup to continue reading
Mel Burgess, of Love Parenting Newcastle, said it made sense to "check in with how they are feeling" about the incident.
She said it was healthy to "let them have that feeling" and "reassure them" it was normal.
"Feelings are like wees. When someone only lets you have half a wee, the other half is still in there needing to get out."
Mrs Burgess said it might "look like your child is OK" in the short term.
"But the rest of the feeling will find its way out in another potentially much less convenient setting in the form of dysregulated behaviour.
"So just let them have the whole feeling, even though it feels hard to see them upset."
Mrs Burgess, a former University of Newcastle parenting educator, said parents should resist the urge to keep their kids "appearing comfortable by moving them off topic and sugar-coating the facts".
"If they get the sense from the way we respond that they are safe to talk about big things like this, then they learn we can be trusted in the future with things they are having a feels-fest about."
She said parents should "honour any silence".
"You don't need to fill the gaps. Perhaps use the time to keep centring yourself."
She said this could be done by taking "a long slow breath".
"This event was tragic. A few seconds spent centring yourself will immeasurably help you usefully meet whatever feelings your child brings," she said.
Mrs Burgess said on the Love Parenting Newcastle Facebook page that the tragedy was a chance to connect with older teens around concepts like "impulse control, a driver's responsibility, justice, empathy, the media's role, remorse and regret".
"Don't underestimate the power of these conversations. Talking with our children about the complexities of situations like the heartbreaking bus crash doesn't just help them ... it helps future society."
She also highlighted the power of a hug. "The science behind what a 20-second hug provides physiologically is incredible."
